Not a happy bunny
by WitchWarren
Summary: When someone magical isn't happy people need to watch out! ...Or should they...? Cover Art by nicci mac


Arthur's first thought upon realising the streak of gangly limbs that ran past him was indeed his manservant was; "Merlin."

Not half a second later his second thought was; "_Merlin?_"

This was swiftly accompanied by a shout of "_**Merlin!**_" as the King whirled as chased after his supposedly former manservant and Court Magician. They burst out of the front doors into the courtyard, startling several bystanders in the process – not that the King noticed. The warlock had finally slowed down slightly, coming to a stuttering stop but not releasing any agitation in his body as he jerkily looked about and then dashed for the side of the castle. Towards the armoury. "_Mer_lin! What _on earth_ is _**going on**_**_?"_**

"Running." Was all the king got – as gasping reply as he reached his friend, paused in front of the armoury door, still frantic and clearly terrified – before said door was slammed in his face.

Arthur wrenched it open just as quickly, finding an obviously terrified Merlin crouched on the other side, looking up frantically at the intrusion. "What are you **_doing_?"**

"Hiding." And the door was slammed _again_, nearly wrenching his arm out in the magical process. Arthur stumbled, paused, and then with no little bit of frustration wrenched it open a second time in as many seconds.

Merlin looked up from the crossbow he was examining, "How effective would you say this would be?"

"Effective against _what?_"

"Effective _against_ me." Sounded an ominous voice behind him. Turning King Arthur beheld the last in a series of puzzling events – Freya, Merlin's wife.

Looking past him Merlin took on a look of abject terror – not unlike a deer in the crosshairs – before bursting into a rapid flurry of activity; "Freya nothing was going on I swear I was just helping out – she looked like she was in trouble – we were just talking – she actually asked how you were faring – I _didn't __**do**_ ANYTHING! You have to believe me – I'm not out for anything I wasn't looking for anything – I _wasn't –"_

Only when the loud bang of the armoury door cut him off Merlin seemed to realise that he was hovering immobile in front of his wife. Arthur had to laugh at his panicked and fearful expression – only to find himself in the same position. Staring into the vengeful glare the King had to concede that maybe his former manservant was right to fear his wife.

"You think it's _funny?"_ Freya shrieked, suddenly tipping the King upside down and shaking him. Head almost dangerously close to the ground Arthur wisely shuts up. From his position he can see Merlin being flung to the wall above the armoury door with a "Just _stay there!" _while he himself is raised a little higher from the ground. And with that she disappears in a flurry of wind – apparently leaving them there to stew.

Freya was so considerate.

There was a beat of silence.

"She's been a little temperamental since the pregnancy huh? The baby's magic just feeds her own. I have to say—"

"**_Mer_lin?"**

"Yes?"

"_Shut. Up."_

There was another beat of silence.

"So I take you don't want me to let you down then?"

"_**What!"**_

"Well it's easier to just play along when she's in a like this and really with the baby feeding her magic as well as making her a little–"

"No one _asked _for an explanation _Merlin_ GET ME DOWN FROM HERE!"

Arthur lands head-first, tumbling about in an ungainly heap as his body finally succumbed to gravity. Merlin floated down more gracefully, a smug expression on his face for Arthur to glare at.

"You said get you down. I thought you'd appreciate the haste."

Whatever appropriately scathing and witty retort that had been about to escape from Arthur's lips was halted by the reappearance of Freya. With Guinevere.  
Ah _hell_.

And so that was how – on otherwise unremarkable midday – the King and Court Sorcerer spent several hours pinned to the wall atop the armoury doors.

"At least they put us both upright up this time."

"_Really_ Merlin?"

"You're the one that thought it a '_wonderful omen'_ that our wives were pregnant at the same time."

"Merlin?"

"I told you you'd taken too many blows to the head."

"_Mer_lin?"

"Do you ever listen to me? _No_."

"MERLIN!"

"_Yes **Sire**."_

"Shut up and _do_ something about those people down there – a King cannot be seen like this!"

"Why not? I think it boosts public morale." Merlin worked an arm free to wave, smiling down at the crowd.

"Merlin?"

"Hmm?"

"Shut up."

* * *

Witch: Ok this was a drabble plotbunny that somehow called all it's friends before it was truly completed. Bad plotbunny survival skills. It really should know better. Silly bunny.

But now that this bunny can be released into the fandom the rest can be appeased…until they start clamouring for me to finish their chapters. MULTICHAPTER BUNNIES! WHY MUSE WHY?

On a side note; ff net keeps eating my punctuation - anyone know a mod I could complain to?


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